"Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life." - Seneca
There was a time in my life where the first thought I had upon waking each day was, "Oh, God, what day is it?" If the answer was anything but Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and sometimes Thursday (Friday Jr.!!!!), I woke up dreading the day.
This was not a favorite time in my life. Waking up to dread is no way to wake up. Waking up to dread sets the tone for your entire day. When the first thought you have when you wake up is dread and disillusionment, you'll spend your day finding ways to prove yourself right. Your entire day, week, month, year, and life will suck regardless of what day of the week it is. Trust me. Remember, if you wake up dreading your day, you're the one to blame, not the day of the week.
Waking up and feeling dread because of an arbitrary, culturally constructed way to organize our chronological experience is literally the epitome of victim thinking.
"Hump day. Amirite?!" Shut up.
We, as a culture, put a lot of pressure on weekends to make us happy. Most people slog through jobs they hate that take up most of their week, zap them of energy, which then bleeds into every other area of free time they have -- on weekends, mornings, and evenings. Even though they've been praying for the weekend, they go into the weekend with the same low energy, blasé, repetitive attitude that they take with them during the week. Tell me again how that's restful, relaxing, and restorative? How exactly does that help you to build a life you love?
Brief digression here: if you wait for the weekend to have a life you love, that's literally less than 17% of your life that you're looking forward to. You lose even more time when you consider how shitty you feel on when Sunday afternoon fades into Sunday evening.
People will march through the week with a glassy eyed "get this over with" attitude, to get to that fun, exciting, liberating WEEEEKEND, only to wallow through the weekend, doing nothing from their couch (rather than their desk), and dreading the week ahead. Or maybe, you've decided the weekends the time to get rip-roaring drunk and / or high --- which in and of itself is problematic for a number of reasons which I am not qualified to help with.
How you spend your weekend gives you a clear picture into to how you're living your entire life. Seriously. Evaluate how you spend your weekends, decide what you like and don't like, and start building something better. The rest of your life will reflect the changes.
Maybe your weekends are more of your week. Is that a good or a bad thing? Do you meticulously plan your weekends? Do you actually have fun on the weekends? Do you sleep them away? Do your weekends slip away before you realize it? Are your weekends filled with obligations that you're not interested in fulfilling? Do you bound into Monday morning ready to build something great each week, or do you lurp your way into Monday?
A lot of people will say that they "deserve" to lounge around and do nothing over the weekend because they hate their job and their week was tough. To them, I say, you "deserve" the life you're willing to create for yourself.
Your weekend reflects the larger picture of your life. Depending on what's going on in your life your weekend might look different. For example, leading up to my wedding, weekends were dominated with wedding activities. That's no longer the case, so my weekends look different now, obviously. If you just bought a home, maybe your weekends are dominated by household projects. That's mostly a good thing, so long as you're making time for other weekend things. Having weekend projects mean you're making things happen in your life.
Look at your weekends and evaluate how they correlate to the rest of your life. If you look at your weekends and you're not having fun, not making progress, or not spending time doing a least a few things you're excited about, chances are the rest of your life looks the same. This is how we "suddenly" wake up at 60 wondering why we never made it to the Grand Canyon or even to check out that local museum we've been meaning to check out but never get around to.
Take a look at your weekends and start building a life you love by changing how you spend your weekends. A lot of coaching clients will tell me they're powerless to change their workweeks because of a boss, inflexible work schedule, or "not having time." So I make them start with their weekends. You DO have control over your weekends. We don't start with the weekends so that you look forward to the weekends more than the week -- although that usually is the case in these scenarios. We start with the weekends because this is where people have control. Once they get a sense of power and control back into part of their life, they want it (and are willing to stretch themselves for it) in other parts, too.
If you're just letting your weekends happen to you, chances are good that you're just letting life happen to you -- and that is how victims chooses to live their lives. Tell me in the comments below, what is one fun thing you're doing this weekend?