The One Person in Your Life You Should NEVER Piss Off


There is one person in your life who you have knowingly or unknowingly pissed off at one point or the other. No question. You've made enemies with this person before and you will make enemies with this person again. 

If you haven't figured it out already this person is a version of you. It's: Your Future Self (YFS). I think that there are three chronological versions of you. Your Future Self. Your Current Self. And, Your Past Self. 

We've talked about your Beyonce Self, but Your Future Self is different. You are are Your Future Self, right now and also in the future from this moment. The Current Self that's decided to read this is Your Future Self to the Past Self of yesterday. They all exist on their own and together at the same time.  Woah, trippy. 

Think of it like this, there are 3 versions of you at any given time:

Past Self
Past Self was. Its status is immutable. Past Self has little control about what behaviors get heaped onto it -- whether it's good or bad. Past Self is often blamed for the outcomes Future Self encounters (good or bad) when really Current Self should be held accountable. The decisions Current Self make immediately become the decisions of Past Self. 

Current Self
Current Self is. This version of Self is fleeting, but the one that's driving the bus. This is the Self that's making decisions that will affect Past and Future Self. Sometimes Current Self makes less than stellar decisions that make Past Self look lazy and make Future Self upset. Current Self also makes good decisions that make Past Self look on top of its shit and makes Future Self grateful to Past Self. Current Self quickly turns into Past Self. 

Future Self

Future self will be. Your Future Self is watching your Current and Past selves right now through your memories. She sees it all. Your Future Self is the Big Kahuna. It's the Self that you want to please, make proud, and feel happy. Future Self reaps the emotional benefit of the work Current and Past Self do and the emotional burden of the work Current and Past Self don't do. 

When Current Self makes short sighted decisions for instant gratification, it's at the expense of Future Self's happiness and fulfillment. When current self makes decisions that will improve Future Self's life in the short and long term, Future Self is pleased. To maximize happiness and fulfillment in your life, make decisions that most benefit Future Self. 

Right now you are a Future Self looking back at Past Self's behaviors - that could be the Past Self of yesterday, a week ago, or five years ago. At this same moment, you are a Current Self making decisions about your life. Another Future Self will look back at this moment and see you as a Past Self. Ok, ok, I think you get it. 

Here's where this thinking yields practical application: What are you doing today that your Future Self will thank Past Self for?

This could be something long term that you work toward a little bit everyday, such as eliminating sugar from your diet, taking a class, starting a fitness routine, or contacting a lawyer to start your business. It could also be something simple, like making sure that you finish putting the laundry away immediately after you fold it, making a grocery list,  or unpacking from a trip as soon as you get home. It's these little decisions to act in the moment that make Future Self's life much better and easier.  

When Future Self's life is better, Current Self starts making decisions from a happier, better place. So, which then makes Past Self looks like a hero. Current Self loves when Past Self did a good job. Making decisions and taking action from a position of gratitude and joy will always make positive change happen faster. 

When life isn't what you want it to be, it's really easy to look back on Past Self's decisions and be disappointed. The inclination is that people look back on their Past Selves and feel guilt or shame over the decisions that were made that got them to the point where they currently are and don't want to be. Let me be super clear: guilt and shame never spur positive future action. I will say it again for those in the back: guilt and shame never spur positive future action. Trying to change your life from a place of guilt and shame is a futile endeavor. 

So, if Your Future Self is looking back and is a little pissed off at your Past Self for not making better decisions, you've just learned a valuable lesson about what you want in your life. Feel grateful for that discovery, that you never would have made if not for your lazy Past Self. Now, Current Self has a clearer picture of what decisions to make and a better starting point to make Future Self happier.

Each day, I try to do one thing from each of the below categories to make my Future Self look back with pure gratitude. Gratitude begets more action and momentum. These things you do for your Future Self don't have to be huge, they can be, but tiny steps make for an improved future. You can make little decisions now that make your Future Self of the next hour happy. 

1. Mental: Did I read a book today? Did I listen to an educational podcast? Did I spend time learning something new?
2. Physical: Did I use my standing desk today? Did I walk at least a mile? Did I go to the gym? Did I prep food? How much protein did I eat today? Did I do a face mask?
3. Emotional: Did I journal today? Did I express genuine gratitude to someone important to me? Have I been kind to myself? Did I celebrate my wins? Did I explore an interest beyond my businesses?

Remember, your Future Self is always watching. Are you making decisions that will make Your Future Self proud? What is a tiny decision you can make right now that will make Your Future Self feel better in an hour?